It's 4 a.m. I can't sleep--so I have wrote (more like adapted) you all a song concerning the difficulties of my predicament right now.
See, my dietitian informs me that I need to gain weight (I won't tell you how little I've gained this pregnancy--you mothers would cringe and cover your eyes), and I realized that this might be the only chance I get to make you all jealous.
Ha, ha, ha--(evil laugh)
(To the tune of It's the Hard Knock Life from the musical Annie-and a one, and a two, and a. . .)
It's the hard-knock life for me!
It's the hard-knock life for me!
'Steada apples,
I get cake,
'Steada bananas
Chocolate milkshakes
It's the hard-knock life!
Got no fat to speak of, so,
Eat all I want to grow!
Bagels 'n' smeare
'Steada toast
Bacon 'n' sausage
Sunday pot roast
It's the hard-knock life!
Can you hear my stomach a growl'n?
Guess I'll take another bite!
Better eat that flaky pastry
It's so wrong it can't be right!
Dietitian's there when your plates all clean!
Only cares if you grow. . .or if you shrink!
One more bite and I swear I'll turn green!
After all this eatin' and she wants me to have an Ensure drink!
Ohhhh!!!!!!!!!!
Full belly life!
Always eatin' life!
Full of heartburn life!
More tomorrow life!
Exercise I never see
Jillian Michaels, what's that?
Who's she?
Piece a cheesecake? Just a smidge
Save the rest for later in the fridge!
It's the hard-knock life for me
It's the hard-knock life for me
Chocolate brownie? One more piece.
Calorie consumption must increase
IT'S A HARD-KNOCK LIFE!
____________________
Hate me yet? Ok, it honestly isn't this bad--thinking of food actually makes me want to throw up but we might as well appreciate the irony of the situation right?
(Also, my dietician is amazing--I love her, but today she got to play the bad guy. So Sorry!)
4 comments:
Hi! I found your blog through Ashley Calaway (she is cousins with my husband).
I have read through your past month or so of posts and have been so uplifted by your gratitude and optimism.
Miracles do happen. I know this first hand. I was told at my 16 week ultrasound that my daughter (my 3rd) would not live do to severe congenital hydrocephalus (water on the brain). There was no chance. So each day I would wait to feel her kick; to know that she was still with me. Each and everyday I would wonder it this would be my last with her. But she kept living....she kept beating the odds. Now she is 2 1/2 years old. She lives a life with great hardships and handicapps....but she is my miracle, my sweet angel from heaven who reminds me daily of the beauties of life.
Miracles are real.
Thanks for sharing your story with us. I will be sure to keep you and your family in my prayers.
Yes im honestly jealous we have the flu around here and all ive done all day is throw up!! Im so hungry all i want to do is EAT! But of course im to scared in case i have to throw it all up again. So enjoy it for me!! Did you make up that poem its really cute!
I hate you. :) That's all I have for today.
You just keep eating a way! I hope you can gain some weight! I love the picture of you and Colton! I'm glad you had a good time with you family this weekend and hope you have a good day today!
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