Tomorrow I would have met you sweetheart.And you would have cried. Loud, beautiful cries. Daddy and I would have cried too.
Your older brother would have come to visit and maybe sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to you like we have been practicing.
Grandma would be on a plane to come see you, and put red kisses on your cheeks.
Grandpa would have called, and told Daddy well done on another boy.
It's okay sweetheart--I know you wanted to stay. I'm just so grateful for the time we had together. You hung on for seven weeks more than anyone could have asked for, or expected. You did great. Thank you for kicking so much, and for looking just like your Daddy. Thank you for that strong, steady heart beat--I loved listening to it everyday.
Yes, tonight would have been a sleepless one for both of us in the world we wished we lived in. But since we don't, and since I will be sleeping tonight--let's meet in a dream. Let's go to the beach and play in the sand. Don't worry about sunscreen--remember, you don't sunburn in dreams. But do hold my hand, and let me kiss you. We'll have a picnic together, and if it's windy we could fly a kite. I'll even invite Daddy and Colty to come too. Sound good?
Good. Then it's a date. Sweet dreams baby doll.
Love,
Mom
6 comments:
"the world we wished we lived in"
I hope your dreams take you there, and your reality seems a little less harsh upon waking.
Hillary,
once again, i know you don't really know me...
but, know this, my mama heart is with you right now.
you are a special person and i hope your dreams are sweet tonight.
prayers for you,
megan
I've been thinking about Shiloh the last few days knowing that his original due date was coming. I miss him too - the grandson we will have to wait to get to know again. I pray for sweet peace to fill your heart.
Love,
Mom
Hillary, Today must be a hard day for you today and i hope you get to meet Shiloh again in your dreams as you wished but Shiloh wouldve said" Keep moving forward" we go on with our lives and we will re-unite with Shiloh once again.We love you and hope to see you and little Colton soon love you =)
My heart is heavy today and I know it shouldn't be, but I can't help it. I ache so bad for the two of you and I ache for myself. I know it is extremely selfish of me, but I have to tell the truth. I was holding a newborn in our ward last Sunday and couldn't help but think that this could be Shiloh. I know that he is in a much better place, but my selfish heart wants him here with us.
I had the chance to go to his grave site and just knelt there and bawled my eyes out. I miss him and feel deprived to have known him on this earth. I am grateful that I was able to hold him if it was for a brief moment in time. I look forward to seeing him again. I just try to live my life that I am worthy of seeing him again.
I love you and miss you terribly!
oh hillary, this made me BAWL! like a baby, I hope you were granted a sweet tender mercy and got to meet your baby in your dreams, I have so much admiration for you and it is so humbling to see how you handle things, you have a beautiful heart and are sadly missed in Iowa. I wish I would have had the chance to get to know you better.
Love the Robinsons' (Tiffany, Nathan, Coby, Chase and Caitlyn)
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